Women's Day - What's in ONE day?

ALL THE "HUNGAMA" ABOUT WOMEN’S DAY

Scores of wishes on facebook, loads of forwards on whatsapp and too many advertisements trying to cash on the sentiment….that was how eventful, the 8^th of March, 2017 was. Well it wasn’t an ordinary day after all! It was one of the most widely celebrated days – International Women’s Day.

While everyone around me exults in the glory of the day, this “special day” always makes me feel very bitter. Call me negative, regressive or whichever adjective suits you best, but this day doesn’t make me excited at all. On the contrary, it annoys and angers me tremendously. For all you those wondering what’s wrong with me, let me tell you, it’s not me. It is WHERE and HOW we live.

The whole world celebrates women on this special day but what are we Indians celebrating this day for? One odd day, India suddenly decides to make its’ women folk feel great about themselves. There will be a card and flowers from the HR department, a box of chocolates from someone, some beautiful inspirational quotes on your FB wall, some emotional messages on your whatsapp, too many advertisements celebrating the successful woman, restaurants and cafes selling deals, jewellery and apparel stores offering discounts and then, the very next day, all of this just fizzles out….I repeat…. just fizzles out…. like the fizz of a soda.

Is this, what women deserve? Just one fancy day to celebrate womanhood? Out of 365 days, we idolise women on this ONE day and on ALL the other days, we are happy to treat them like crap! We Indians are comfortable in objectifying women, in treating them as one’s own personal property, in slut shaming them whenever we feel like, not batting an eyelid before saying something derogatory to them, violating their modesty at our own free will and then on the 8^th of March, we will celebrate Women’s Day!

Why should we celebrate it? Oh yes! I know the answer. The entire world is celebrating it, then why should we be left behind. However much like a prawn we are, spineless and with a head full of shit, yet we don’t want to be labelled as backward. Do we? What a colossal shame!

So, for all the wonderful Indians who banked upon the idea of celebrating Women’s Day, in whichever way suited them best, please refrain from doing so in the future. Not until we Indians are actually prepared for it. By preparation I mean, respect all the worthy women in your life (I’m sure most of them will be). As they say, everything begins at home. So instead of looking outside, first learn to respect your mother, who works tirelessly for you; your sister, who cares for you; your wife, who does everything for you because she loves you and your daughter, who deserves to choose a happy life for herself.

Once you’ve learnt this, you will automatically learn to respect every other woman. Respect them in the actual sense. Don’t mistake their friendliness for flirtatiousness, don’t mistake their way of dressing for an open invitation, don’t look down upon her if she chooses to party late into the night with her friends, don’t think she’s available if she’s alone, don’t judge her for the choices she makes and most importantly – don’t mistake her love for you to be her weakness.

India will be in position to celebrate Women’s Day, the day our women feel safe on the roads, the day they are not victimised for being a woman, the day when they are not thrown acid at, the day when they are not leered at, the day when no one feels them up in a crowded place, the day when they have no apprehensions of leaving home after dark, the day when no one walks up to them at the bar with the line – “Waiting for someone or waiting for just anyone?”

That is the day, when India will actually be prepared to celebrate Women’s Day, and why just one day, every day then will be a celebration.

Until then, there’s absolutely no point in it. A woman definitely deserves a lot more than just one day to glorify her.

Image credits: Google

The horrific paedophiles!

                         Paedophiles around! Beware!!!

Recently the newspapers of Delhi were flooded with news of a paedophile named Sunil Rastogi who was apprehended on the complaint of parents whose daughters could have been victims of this man’s carnal desires had they not raised an alarm in time.

The man when caught, claimed to have sexually abused over 500 girl children over a span of 12 years!!!

This revelation is so spine chilling! Imagine a man who is a serial rapist, has been freely roaming around for the last twelve years.

Such disturbing news pieces, make it important for parents, to sit back and think deeply about paedophiles.

·        So, who exactly is a paedophile?

Not going into the technicalities and making it simple, a paedophile is an adult who is sexually attracted towards children specifically those who have not yet attained puberty.

It isn’t that parents are not aware of such people existing in the society but it is extremely important to identify them in the first place. Not that it is easy task, but a little alertness can go a long way in saving your child from being victimized.

A paedophile does not stand out from the crowd, in fact such people easily merge with the crowd and so go unidentified.

·        In most cases paedophiles are known to the child.

The movie, Kahaani 2, had the gory tale of a little girl being sexually molested by her own uncle! However strange it may sound, studies reveal that in 30% cases of child molestation, predators are close family members. While this is shocking for most of us, those who have undergone such trauma will vouch for it.

If not a family member, then around 60% cases have molesters, who were known to the child and their family.

Isn’t it sad to think that a person whom the child and the family trusts, turns out to be the same person who scars the future of the child forever?

·        Though not evident, still there are certain identifiable characteristics of paedophiles.

A paedophile doesn’t show much interest in adults and likes to be with children. To be able to be amongst children, they take up jobs which will let them interact more with children. They refuse to treat children as babies and try to interact with them as adults often referring to them as they would to an adult lover.

Being good with children and enjoying their company doesn’t necessarily mean that a person is a paedophile, so please don’t go maniac about it. Just keep an eye on the way that person is interacting with your child. A paedophile will normally try to gain the trust of a child and slowly involve the child in sexual games, expose them to porn videos and encourage them to keep secrets from their parents.

Now that we know, who and how threatening paedophiles are, the big question is what should parents do?

The first thing that parents should do is –

·        Educate your child :

The first and most important step is to educate your child. It is important that children are educated about good touch and bad touch from very early in life. If you are not being able to understand how to do it, seek the help of the internet. You will come across various animated videos which will make it easier for you to communicate what you want, to your child in a way , she/he understands best.Children are way smarter than we think and will be able to differentiate between the two easily if their parents have pre-warned them.

·        Develop a bond :

It is imperative that parents develop a deep bond with their children. Whether you’re a working parent or a homemaker, either ways, you should not let your child be emotionally detached from you. Talk to your child frequently so that the child knows that she/he can trust you no matter what happens.

This bond developing does not happen overnight. It is a slow process which starts from when the child is an infant. So don’t wait for any special moment but continuously work on the trust building factor right from the time you become a parent.

·        Be vigilant :

Always ensure that you know the whereabouts of your child. If your child uses private transport (like a car) to school, try to have someone accompany the child. 

In case the child uses school transport, make sure that the bus has suitable arrangements in place like a nanny to accompany the children.

If you send your child to a day care, be sure that the place is equipped with CCTV cameras so that nobody can try any wrong move with your child. Insist on seeing the footage from time to time so that the day care authorities and workers know that they are being monitored.

When playing outdoors,check out if someone is showing extra interest in your child and see if your child is playing with children much above her/his age.

Keep having regular conversation with your child so that they can confide in you if there is anything amiss.

·        Never blame or quieten your child :

Experiencing the worst, if your child has somehow been sexually victimised, the worst one can do as a parent is to blame the child for the act or trying to suppress the incident due to fear of public shaming. If at all your child has fallen prey to a paedophile’s sinister moves, then you must do all you can to comfort your child. It is your duty as a parent to ease out the trauma of the child. However shattering it might be for you as a parent, it is far more traumatic for the child who has undergone it, so gather all your strength and give your child abundant love and care required to deal with the trauma.

Another mistake that parents often make is to quieten the child for fear of public shaming. This is the worst mistake they can make as not only does it scar your child’s psyche, it also lets a paedophile go loose to commit such crimes further. The child in no way is responsible for such an act so one must never blame the child for this. The person who is actually responsible for this must be sent behind bars immediately.

Though the society is flooded with all sorts of crimes these days, rape, molestation and any other form of sexual abuse is the worst form of crime. It is extremely traumatic for the survivor to go on with a regular life after having experienced something as horrific as this. We, as responsible citizens of the society must try to prevent such incidents from happening and if we come across someone who has been victimised, then do all we can to make that person bounce back to life.

A tribute to the legendary actor Om Puri

                                                              The legendary Om Puri

Friday, the 6^th of January 2017, didn’t turn out to be a happy day for the film fraternity as well as many theatre lovers all across India. The legendary actor of Indian cinema, Om Puri, passed away after a massive heart attack.

Born to a non-filmy family in Punjab, Om Puri was always passionate about theatre and joined the NSD to accomplish his desire. He went on to act in several Hindi, Marathi, Punjabi, British and American movies and TV Series. His stellar performances made him win many awards including Filmfare, National and the coveted Padma Shri in the year 1990.

His role as a police officer in the 1983 cop film, Ardh Satya, made him a known face among all cinema-goers. The zeal and passion with which he approached his characters and his distinct voice, made him climb high in the popularity chart of Indian Cinema.

During his career, he contributed to mainstream commercial films, art films, lend voice over to animated characters, anchored a few shows and even worked on the small screen.

His voice over for Bagheera in the famous movie Jungle book, in the year 2016, cannot be forgotten.

Through his performances, Om Puri always came across as a serious man, however, his comic side came to the forefront with shows on Indian television like Kakka Ji Kahin (in which he played the funny kakka ji) & Mr. Yogi (in which he played the sutradhar).

A career which started in the year 1972, went on successfully till the year 2016. His last appearance on screen was as a lohar in the movie Mirzya. However, his fans will still be able to see him in 4 upcoming movies, 2 Kannada, 1 English and 1 Pakistani movie this year.

His personal life was tainted with accusations of being abusive to his 2 wives, however, we shall refrain from commenting upon this issue at such a time.

This post mainly aims at honouring a man whose versatile performances kept us all entertained over the past 44 years.

Om Puri ke liye OM SHANTI !

PC: Google.

Splendid Kashmir

                                                  Splendid Kashmir - Guide to Kashmir


Splendid Kashmir 12 June 2014

Splendid Kashmir Highlights :

Food to Relish - Wazwan ( Rista/Gushtaba/Yakhni/Roghan Josh/ Waaza Chicken etc)
Drink to Relish - Kahwa ( Kashmiri Tea)
Snacks to relish - Trout fish at Abdul Rasheed’s Shikara @ Dal Lake
Cakes - Dry fruit cake and Plum cake


The scorching sun and the cool breeze…..the lush green mountains and the grazing sheep……the river flowing by the road and the snaking streets…..Kashmir is a total delight for all those who long for a cool retreat! …….said, “If there is heaven on Earth, then it is in Kashmir.” The beauty of Kashmir is surreal . It’s beauty is beyond compare. Words fall short when one makes an attempt to describe the beauty of this paradise.

Terrorism had infested this divine place in the eighties and nineties, thus bringing tourism to a halt. The divinity of Kashmir could not be experienced by nature enthusiasts for over a decade thus breaking a lot many hearts. Ever since, I grew up, I garnered a desire to witness the enthralling and rapturing beauty of Kashmir. We planned to visit it for our honeymoon but the fear of getting our lives ended even before we embarked onto our marital journey deterred us from going there. 11 years later, the opportunity came in the form of an invitation from a family member. Tickets done, packing done, we were all set to explore this gorgeous place on earth.

This article deals with our fun and travails during our Kashmir visit.

Day 1 : Flight from New Delhi to Srinagar -
Tip - Ensure a web check in before your flight.

We forgot to do this and ended up with separate seats. Romance goes for a toss ….sigh!!!! First sign of relief…..a view of the snow covered peaks. Beauty! Reached Srinagar airport and were glad to have a quick checkout. Destination - our houseboat in Nigeen Lake. To reach the houseboat, we had to use the Shikara (first sign of fun). Freshening up quickly, we took a shikara ride to the famous Dal Lake. It was a lovely backwater experience. Wading through the weeded waters of the lakes, having a glimpse of the lakeside locals, the lament at the sight of abandoned houses of the Kashmiri Pundits…..the ride was like a walk through the history of Kashmir.

The backwaters opened up into the happening Dal Lake. It was abuzz with activities. The highlight was the Meena Bazar which was bustling with shoppers waiting to grab a piece of Kashmir for themselves. The lake was flooded with shikaras all over, with some shikaras also selling food items. Hubby and little boy has a quick bite at tandoori trout fish. The expressions were yummy! Some shopping at the Meena Bazar myself and then dinner at Stream Restaurant. Back to the houseboat to catch some good sleep in preparation for an action packed day 2.

Highlight at the restaurant - Pasta Arabiatta.
Quick tip : Nigeen Lake is a very quiet lake in Srinagar. If opting for a peaceful holiday, stay at Nigeen Lake.

Day 2 : Day trip to Sonmarg -
Tip - The ghoda-wallahs will pester you like anything. Check out the rates at the Kashmir govt. tourism office right at the foot of the hill from where the journey to Thajiwas glacier starts.

Booked a taxi for all our forthcoming days in Kashmir. Headed to Sonmarg to witness our first Kashmiri snow :-) Delight gripped my sonny boy on sighting the very first glimpses of snow. It was supposedly his first stint with the white beauty and he was looking forward to it with much anticipation and excitement. On reaching, we were immediately swarmed by the ghoda-wallahs , all trying to fool us. Not to be taken for a ride, we decided to check out the government rates and then settled in for Rs. 1000/ person return trip to and from Thajiwas Glacier. We booted up to be able to save our shoes from getting wet.

The ride was just an average one but as soon as we reached the glacier, we were enthralled! All around there was so much beauty, that our jaws dropped with amazement. For the first time in my life was I encountering such beauty with my own two eyes! The sledge-wallahs, the chai walls, the ski-wallahs, and the kesar/ shilajeet wallahs constantly endeavour to annoy you and spoil your fun. All you need to do is be firm and tell them to move away. You can only absorb the purity of the place when you pave your way up the mountain, away from the maddening crowd. That’s exactly what we did, and it was indeed sheer bliss.

We could have sat there for ages had the time not been pressing us to return. We returned to the base, quickly boarded our taxi and started our drive back to Srinagar. Dinner and then tucked away in beds. House Boat Meal 

Day 3 : Day trip to Gulmarg -
Tip - Get your Gondola tickets booked at the TRC/ online through travel agents to avoid the ticket buying queue. By all means, avoid the touts.

The third day of our trip was indeed most annoying. Having booked our tickets for the gondola through the government TRC office, we were happy to avoid the long queue at the ticket booking counter but shockingly we were in for something even worse.

On reaching Gulmarg, we got to know that the Gondola was not functioning due to some technical fault. Crap! One full day ruined. Anyways, even for getting a refund, we had to get our tickets stamped so we decided to walk up to the office. Reaching there we discovered that there was some scope of restoration so we decided to try our luck. Standing in the scorching sun for 5 hours, we finally got our boarding passes as the gondola had restarted. Heaving a sigh of relief, we sat in the gondola, got down at phase 1 (Gulmarg to Kungdoor) and immediately boarded the gondola to phase 2 (Kungdoor to Apharwat).

That was the highlight of the day. Standing at a height of 14,000 ft above sea level, we were marvelled by the aura of the place. The skies resonated with our excitement. LOC was actually visible from there….Little snow flakes started falling from above as if to bless us. We were lost in our surroundings, when we were told that the weather is worsening and we need to head back. The gondola line was again chaotic and slow. We somehow managed to board one and reached phase 1. Snow eluded us here as it had melted away and was now at a distance. That too was dirty and muddy and we had no intentions of spoiling our mood.

Next we planned to get back to the base but were informed that the gondola had snapped yet again! Braving the conditions, we decided that we couldn't wait anymore and so planned to walk down. It was an hour long walk down a hilly terrain with obviously not the right shoes (we were wearing gumboots for the snow) and could have proved painful but for our cheery spirits :-)

Leading us was Ansh, who almost ran down the entire hill and reached the base a good 15-20 minutes before us. The walk down was great though. Rocks and streams came as hurdles in our way but we overcame then jubilantly. Finally the day ended and we headed back to Srinagar. On the way we stopped to meet relatives at Tangmarg and it was great meeting with them.

Later we had dinner at the famous Mughal Darbar restaurant. Food was good but the service was really slow and inadequate. Hoping for the following day to be better, we quickly made our way to sleep.

Day 4 - Day trip to Yousmarg
Tip - Don’t compare the ghoda-wallahs here with the ones at Gulmarg and Sonmarg. The ones at Yousmarg are way better.

Not wanting a horse ride anymore we were determined to walk our way around in Yousmarg. First, we headed to Doodh Ganga. Ansh was thrilled at the prospect of a horse ride and we wanted him to enjoy his trip to the fullest. So we got him a horse and walked along with him. Reaching the Doodh Ganga, we were glad that there were no annoying tourists around. It was a peaceful place. My hubby and son in fact, had a real time chilling experience when they put their feet in the waters of the stream. It was freezing cold!!!!

A ghoda wallah came over to ask us if we were wishing to see a few more beautiful points. Since he didn’t quote any amount, we were convinced that he wouldn’t fool us. We made up our minds to give this ride a try and believe me, This was the best horse ride we had ever had in our entire life till now. The men took us through the forests, by the streams, under the trees and by the grazing sheep.

The scene looked straight out of some fairy tale and we felt like king, queen and prince respectively. The sights were captivating. We couldn’t keep our eyes off the beauty that captured our attention. We felt accomplished and satisfied. We felt at communion with nature. To add to our pleasure, the men here were not greedy hounds like the ones we had encountered in Sonmarg and Gulmarg. There simplicity and undisturbing attitude definitely made them get much more than they had thought of. They really and truly deserved it.

We wanted this ride to be never ending but again, we needed to head back to Srinagar and so we bade adieu to this gorgeous place. Returned to Srinagar. Checked into a houseboat on Dal Lake, had dinner and wrapped ourselves in the blankets for some sleep.

Quick Tip - Stay at Dal Lake and see the town bustling with activity

Day 5 - Day trip to Pahalgam
Tip : Try to limit yourself to visiting just about 3 points. Too many points will kill the fun and you’ll be like just run run….

Pahalgam is famous for its several scenic points and so we decided to explore it too. On the way we got down for some authentic  Kashmiri dry fruits and Kesar shopping. Having filled out shopping bags, we headed towards Pahalgam. The road was paved with apple tress which would be loaded with fruits in August (bad timing….we so wanted to bite into the juicy - red kashmiri apple). The taxi union at Pahalgam has its own rule that no outside taxi will be allowed to take tourists to the points.

At the taxi office, a board stating the various tourist points, along with the taxi charges were written. We were just 3 and the queue was snaking, so we decided to share the taxi with someone whose number was before us and if they too would want to share. Gladly for us, we were approached by an elderly Gujarati couple for sharing their taxi and we quickly agreed :-D

We arrived at the conclusion that we must just visit 3 points, namely the Betaab Valley, Aru Valley and Chandanwadi. The taxi driver drove rashly with us crossing our fingers to reach safe and sound. First stop, Aru valley…..just about an average place and so we moved out quickly without wasting much time. Next was Chandanwadi and on the way was Betaab Valley (which we had to visit while returning). Chandanwadi was again a snow clad mountain and by now we were completely not enthusiastic about wearing gum boots again so we ditched the idea of going into the snow but sent Ansh for a sledge ride. He loved it totally and while he had his share of fun, we happily nibbled onto corn on the cob :-)

Once he returned, we sat in the taxi and got off at Betaab Valley. This valley was earlier nameless and got its name only after Sunny Deol and Amrita Singh’s debut movie, Betaab was shot at this location. The place was taken over by multiple students from various schools and so we didn't spend much time there though it was definitely better than Aru Valley. Back to Pahalgam, we quickly sat in our own taxi and heaved a sigh of relief after the torturous driving of the Pahalgam driver.

On the way back, we stopped at the ruins of Avantipura temple to click some pictures. Once in Srinagar, we dined at the famous restaurant, Adoos. Excellent food and an even better hospitality. Must visit. Once we were out of the restaurant, it started raining and then it rained and thundered entire night!!!

Day 6 - Srinagar local sight seeing

Our eventful travelling had come to an end and today was the day for our local sight seeing. To our relief, Indra Devta had been merciful enough to stop the rains from ruining our day. Our first stop was Shankaracharya temple. Traffic jam forced us to walk quite a bit before we embarked onto our 256 stairs journey! It wasn’t an easy climb but our youth helped us and we managed :-) The temple was beautiful and even more beautiful was the view of Srinagar from there. The Dal Lake was dotted with houseboats and shikaras and they looked pretty from that distance.

Next we visited the Chashmeshahi , Nishat and Shalimar Gardens. They were rich with myriad colours of flowers but were crowded and not that pleasing. Out of the three, Nishat garden was the best. It must have been an eye tonic for the Mughal Emperors.

Having never visited a mosque, I was thrilled at the prospect of getting a chance to visit the famous Hazrat Bal Mosque. We did so and then was time for some quick shopping. Some shawls, some baskets and some Walnut wood showpieces. Shopping was indeed delightful! My boy was obsessed with 6 inches carved chess pieces which he wanted for himself. The price was 40,000!!! On hearing the price, he easily settled for a smaller and cheaper version of chess (the darling that he is). The day trip came to an end and then we went for a long walk at the edge of the Dal Lake. It was a scenic and soothing walk.

Day 7 - Back to Delhi 

The action packed holiday came to an end and we headed back HOME. Sunburnt and boiling, but still happy to be back home. Kashmir was indeed a pleasure. Our very own Switzerland…..heaven on Earth. 

Embracing motherhood at a young age....the benefits of this decision.

“Why do you always stop me from doing things?”, “Why can’t I stay up late at night?”, “Why can’t I play video games?”……These, and many more, are the questions, I’m bombarded with, day in and day out.

Welcome to the world of motherhood!

At the age when girls are hanging around in college, going out for parties, leading a completely carefree life; I chose motherhood. Yes, I chose to be a mother when I twenty and by the time I turned twenty-one, I proudly announced the arrival of my little cherub.

Tiny fingers, entwined in mine, that flaky skin peeling off, that reddish fairish complexion….all made me fall in love with my little one slowly and steadily. The first thought that comes to your mind when you see your baby is, “How could I create a baby! A full human being…..a part of me!!!” And once these overwhelming thoughts clear off, you start living each moment with your baby.

My son was a perfectly happy baby, playful at all times and happy to be in people’s company. Born in a joint setup, he had the pleasure of getting abundant love from all quarters. Being the first baby at his maternal side, he was the apple of everyone’s eyes there as well. His only crying moment would come when he would be extremely hungry. Save that and you were spared the wrath. However, he just wouldn’t want to sleep. And that my friends, was one big problem. Not that he would be cranky, but just that he would be in no mood to sleep at any time of the day or night.

The day was manageable, as he would keep playing merrily, throwing his tiny hands and feet in the air initially, graduating to sitting on the mat and playing with toys strewn all over, to walking around the house when he was one. The only constraint if he took a rare siesta was that I had to be around as even while sleeping, he would frequently open his eyes and if I was seen, he would smile and sleep again instantly but if I wasn’t spotted in the periphery of his bed, all hell would break loose and he would cry loudly.

Nights however, were nightmarish. With my hubby gone off to sea for half of the year, I would be left alone to my own devices. Sleeplessness was taking a toll me as my son would be up almost all night, sleeping only for about half an hour to forty-five minutes at the max and then waking up for another two hours before that half an hour relief came to me. My father in law was a huge support as early in the morning, I would just hand my son over to him after giving him a full feed and then the next four hours would be spent with me being in divine sleep.

Counting a total of sleeping hours, my son would hardly sleep for about 4-6 hours in a total of 24 hours and that too in breaks! God alone knows how he managed all that energy and growth when all studies point out to long hours of necessary sleep for infants. And since he would be up for such long hours, he would be hungry all the time. To compensate for the extra feeding, I had to introduce top feed every 4 hours, apart from breastfeeding him every hour. So, day and night this cycle went on and on.

Then came his crawling stage. Lo and behold! Who on earth would like to crawl? Since I’m baby strange due to my funny sleep pattern, I ought to be different in this sphere as well. So, at the age of 7.5 months, he got up with great difficulty, taking the help of two - thick but empty hard cover files; and took his first five steps into this big world.

If a child chooses to straightaway graduate to walking instead of crawling, there are bound to be difficulties. He was ecstatic that he could do something different, so he would stand up all the time, try to walk with his wobbly knees and in due course, make a mad dash to whichever place he decided as his target and once very close to that place, his excitement would get the better of him and he would fall with a thud. This had to be attended to and so I would always stay on red alert and walk right behind him in a squatting position with arms ready to clutch him in case he falls. This went on for around 2 months, until he was about 10 months old and his walk had steadied considerably.

Once he started walking, I had another challenge to face. As soon as he wanted to pee at night, he would just get up without any warning in the dark and start walking on the bed, towards I don’t know what! So even while sleeping, I had to be alert to spring into action and hold his hand before he falls off the bed with eyes shut.

His no sleep requirement activities went on till he turned 2 years old and then, as if some miracle occurred, he developed a better sleeping pattern.

Looking back at that time, I always feel that had I chosen motherhood at a later stage, I definitely wouldn’t have been able to manage with him as I did at that time. Waking up almost round-the-clock, staying active in whatever little sleep I could manage to walking behind him in a crouching position so that he doesn’t fall and hit his head on the floor; this just wouldn’t have been possible for me now. 

Exhaustion sets in easily now and the knees seem to give away if I try to squat…..not that I’m very old chronologically, but everybody’s platter is so full with various things these days that we start feeling old at a relatively young age.

I just turned 34 and my son is on the threshold of teenage. He will enter his teens in March 2017. Now I have a different set of problems to deal with. I started my article with his usual rants and those are just a fraction of what I get to hear the whole day through. Not that he is a highly disobedient child but the effect of teenage is surely brushing upon him

.

I can only thank my stars for facing this, and all that is to come, at a comparatively younger age. It gives me jitters to think of how I would have handled all this if I had to do so had I been in my forties.

Please note: These are entirely my personal views based on my personal experiences. I do not intend to hurt anyone’s sentiments with this writeup. There are many women around me who have chosen motherhood at a later stage and are far better than me at their job. A big hug for all the lovely mothers out there!

Foot note: My hubby ensured that I didn’t get bogged down by motherhood pressures and occasionally we did go out to the disc. (benefits of staying in a joint setup) We went for a lot many outings and carried our son along almost everywhere. So, I lived and loved life all this while.

GOAN PARADISE

                           GOAN PARADISE

Sun, sand, sea, surf, coconut trees, ethereal beauty and lots of fun…..Goa is synonymous with all of these. One thought of Goa is enough to bring cheer to people’s lives. What Goa does to people is absolutely magical! I’d say it brings out the best in people. You can be completely at ease in Goa, the land of love, the land of unlimited FUN…..

One trip to Goa and you are bound to fall in love with the place. It is like that beautiful woman whom you see once and can’t stop looking at again and again. Goa attracts you just like that woman. An affair with Goa is just inevitable.

As much as we love Goa, regular visits haven’t been possible, but this time, the opportunity came in the form of hubby’s seminar. Seminar of course isn’t any holiday but that was a wonderful excuse to plan a getaway to this wonderful place. We planned a pre and post seminar holiday keeping the seminar days in between. So it was like a warm up session (pre seminar), and a cool down session (post seminar).

Our first resort was at a location which no one actually even considers a location for a holiday. It was close to Bogmalo beach and the resort was called Stonewater Eco Resort. It was what you can truly call a hidden treasure. Placed very strategically with lush green tress all around and the vast sea hitting the shores right under the hillock; the beauty of this place is indescribable. It wasn’t that I just happened to stumble upon this property….it’s just that I had spent hours looking for the perfect place where I would like US to spend a few days…..and this place definitely didn’t disappoint me at all.

Tucked away from the noisy world, this place looked like it was a fairy tale destination.

We had booked a sea view chalet for ourselves and that provided a perfect view of the sea and the pool. Just imagine taking a dip in the pool with a view of the sea and the sun setting in the pink and orange hued horizon!!!

In terms of service and food, it wasn’t up to the mark though, but we weren’t concerned about that at all as we were totally enamored by the beauty of this place. If the monsoon was playing spoilsport elsewhere, here it was just adding to the beauty of the place.

The owner, Nisha and the manager Vanya, both were very forthcoming when it came to giving suggestions about places to visit.

Day 1- We checked in on Thursday and were told that there’s live music at Firefly shack in Benaulim. Since it was raining cats and dogs, we decided to hire a car, instead of our usual choice of a two wheeler in Goa. The rainy car drive from Bogmalo to Benaulim was a memorable one with some old Kishore da tracks playing in the mind.

Firefly was just the place to kick start our holiday with. A local guy Emmanuel was crooning some awesome tracks on the microphone and then a lot of people from the audience sang perfectly like rockstars while we swayed to the music!

Such was the experience that we felt, the long drive to Benaulim was totally worth it.

Must try at Firefly –Seradura (Goan Dessert)

Day 2- The day started with buffet spread which wasn’t quite appealing. However we ate a little and ventured for a tour to old Goa. First stop was St. Augustine’s Tower. This tower was built by the Portuguese between 1597-1602 and is now a ruin. However, the ruins present such a marvelous picture, that this place is a cameraman’s delight. A quick tour and numerous pictureslater we had to run for cover, as the mighty rain God started playing his tunes again.

We then headed for the Basilica of Bom Jesus, which is a world heritage site. The beauty of this place lies in its gold plated architecture and this place is famous for the fact that it holds the mortal remains of St. Francis, which is open to public view. What is surprising is that his body has not decayed over the years. This is a huge miracle and believers from all over the world flock this church to seek the blessings of St. Francis.

Opposite to this church is Se Cathedral, another noted monument.

Tired after all the sightseeing, we decided to hit the very famous Ritz Classic restaurant in Panjim for some authentic Goan cuisine. The Goan Fish thali here is delectable, which my hubby devoured in no time and me the poor vegetarian had to eat Veg Biryani which turned out to be pretty tasty as well! We ate to our heart’s content and then headed back to the resort to brace ourselves for a jazzy evening.

Must try at Ritz – Goan Fish thali

Our manager, Vanya, had briefed us that we must eat at Claudi’s before hitting Joet’s if we wanted some real good food. So the foodies that we are, Claudi’s was out first stop for the evening and I must say that the food here was worth every penny. Hubby relished some superb stuffed crabs and tandoori squid/calamari. Since vegetarians in Goa are sinners, I’ll skip my reviews about veg food and only focus on the seafood part. So coming back to the food, the seafood here was simply mind blowing! After filling our tummies, it was time for some music so we shot out to Joet’s.

Must try at Claudi’s – Stuffed crabs

Joet’s shack is at Bogmalo beach and they have live music every Friday. To our pleasant surprise, the same guy Emmanuel from Firefly was performing at Joet’s as well. This time round, hubby couldn’t control his singing urge and entertained us on the mic. Dancing, singing, eating and drinking……It was a fun filled evening, packed with entertainment. The highlight of the evening was, a nice long friendly conversation and dinner with yesteryears cricketer, Ajay Jadeja and his charming wife.

Must try at Joet’s – Sausage paratha(highly recommended by Ajay Jadeja who ordered it for us) 

                                                                  

Day 3 – This day was meant for relaxation after the previous late night, so we woke up comfortably and lazed around only to move out for lunch at John Seagull’s shack. This place was suggested by my bro-in-law (a BITS alumni), who was a regular at this shack during his BITS days. Turned out the food was yummy and this time the poor vegetarian also got a good option of noodles sizzler while hubby ate his seafood sizzler.

Must try at John Seagull – Noodles sizzler

Back at the resort, we decided to take a dip in the pool as the rains had finally spared us and we could dare to step inside the pool.  Swimming in the pool while eyeing the beauty of the sea is one unforgettable experience!

Dinner was planned at Martin’s corner, an upmarket restaurant, said to be Sachin Tendulkar’s favourite. We drove down to Betalbatim to try out food at this place but weren’t quite happy. The sausages didn’t look like sausages at all but the crew was adamant that they were sausages. We were still unconvinced and soon realized that the people on the next table too were being wrongly convinced by the crew about some dish.The live music too wasn’t appealing and so I wouldn’t rate the place as a must visit place. We soon left the place.

Day 4 – This was the day we had to check out from this heavenly resort and check into ZuriWhitesands resort for the seminar. Coincidently this was also the day when the sun shone brightly for the lone time during our entire stay. ZuriWhitesands isn’t one of the best 5 star properties of Goa, but it does have a lovely stream like pool, which opens up to a large pool. The large expansive lawns and the white sand beach right outside the resort are an asset to the place.

Day 5,6 and 7 – Hubby was occupied with the seminar all the 3 days, while I enjoyed some moments of solitude, reading through my novels. The highlight of the stay was early morning walks along the beach, that started in the dark and got over an hour later when the sun came up. Seeing the fisherman bringing back their boats after a night out at the sea, emptying their nets and sorting the fish, eagles hovering over the boats in search of a quick catch and dogs eyeing an opportunity to grab some fish….it was all spectacular!

These days also provided me an opportunity to interact with hubby’s shore staff and it was wonderful to hear them talk about various incidents, some of which made me feel mighty proud of hubby dear.

The gala night, which is held to celebrate the success of the Seminar, was a fun event; complete with music, dance and sea service awards. Hubby dear too received his sea service award which felt great!

Day 8 – With the seminar finally over, it was time to start the next leg of the vacation. Packing our bags and baggage, we drove towards North Goa’s Anjuna Beach where we had booked ourselves in a Portuguese boutique hotel.

On the way we stopped for lunch on the Kanyakumari-Panvel highway near BITS campus at a restaurant named Antique Mardol. This was our second visit to this restaurant after a gap of 5 years, as it’s the only place on Goa which offers

 Goan Veg Thali. I didn’t want to miss it for anything in the world. The food was yummy-liscious  and I lapped it up hungrily!

Must try at Antique Mardol – Goan Veg Thali/Goan Fish Thali

On reaching the hotel, we were taken aback.The expectations were too high and they didn’t fall in line when we were shown our room. It was in total contrast to our earlier resorts and we didn’t want to disappoint ourselves with a dull room. We intimated the manager about our discomfort and he was courteous enough to upgrade us to a far better room. That was the saving grace. We rested a while to prepare ourselves for a reunion with our lovely friends from Goa, in the evening.

Britto’s, it was, at BagaBeach…..the destination for our reunion. It was special as we were meeting our friends, Neeraj and Jyoti, after about 5 years. A lovely session of food n drinks followed, coupled with some nostalgic conversation and soul to soul talks.

We then parted with the promise of catching up again soon.

Must try at Britto’s – Prawn Curry Rice

Day 9- This day was earmarked for some sunning and tanning at the beach but the weather didn’t seem to favour us and it kept pouring. It wasn’t supposed to dampen our spirits….so we decided to checkout the famous joints at Anjuna.

First stop was Artjuna, a quaint café, offering some Mediterranean food. As we weren’t too hungry, we just hung around for a while, sipped a drink and left for Café Liliput. This place normally holds beach parties and so we were inquisitive to check it out. But blame it on the weather or the muddy seas, we weren’t enamored by the place at all. So we stayed, had a drink, ate some prawns and salad and then made up our mind to hit Curlie’s shack.

Curlie’s shack is a walk down a narrow lane after you have parked your car and you seem to wonder as to where you are heading, but once, the walk is over, you realize, there’s some huge space out there, ready to embrace its guests.

Curlie’s is a huge shack built in two levels and we went up straight to the first floor. The cool breeze of the sea, the splash of the waves hitting the rocks, the wooden structure and people enjoying themselves….all added to the charm of that place. The only drawback of the place was its unresponsive attendants. We did raise this concern with the manager, as however pleasant a place is, the smile of the person who serves you makes it even more pleasant. On the contrary, a frustrated attendant, ruins the entire experience. The manager was apologetic and assured us that it wouldn’t be repeated.

Must try at Curlie’s – Indian Fish Masala Fry

Sun was setting and we had clubbing on our mind, so it was time we left Curlie’s and freshened up for the night-out.

Sinq Club at Sinquerim Beach was the place we had on our minds. Party there starts at 10in the night and goes on till 3 in the morning.

The entry to the club was 1500/- per couple with unlimited drinks inside. It took a little while for the momentum to pick up but once started, there was no looking back. To my delight, it was Bollywood night and the DJ was superb in his song selection. Not single track was repeated entire night and it only got better than the last one.

The bartender was liberal with the drinks and made sure, the unlimited stays unlimited. Also he was quick to remember the drink you ordered first and would refill the same one without delay, whenever you approached him next. The thin crust pizza was also lip smacking!

This place provided us with an awesome clubbing experience after years!!!

Lots of dancing, eating and drinking later, the night, or rather morning, was wrapped up by playing a game of pool at the pool table.

Note – Look out for Sinq club vans on the roads. They hand out discount coupons worth INR 500/-, so if you have it, you just pay 1000/couple entry fee.

Day 10 – Tattoo Day…..this day had been specially reserved for our tattoos. Goa is the place where there is no dearth of tattoo parlors but identifying the right one is the key. Getting inked is not an easy task, as one wrong tattoo and you are stuck for life, unless you go through the pain of laser removal.

This time around, we chose RK’S Ink Exposure at Baga, after careful survey. A week prior to this, we had discussed our respective tattoos with the tattoo artist, Rakesh and he had assured us that we wouldn’t regret it.

Rakesh is a very confident artist, does his work meticulously and maintains hygiene. My tattoo took just about an hour and a half and I was quite happy with the results but before starting to work on hubby’s huge tattoo, we decided to take a lunch break at Fat Fish, Baga. As to tattoo was to be time consuming, we quickly ate some good food.

Must try at Fat Fish – Tandoori Prawns and Vegetable Xacuti

The tattoo’s design was quite detailed and it took about 6 hours with almost no breaks, to finish the tattoo beautifully. The artist as well hubby, both were completely exhausted after this tattoo making exercise. However, both of them were proud and satisfied at the result.

Since there was no time as well as energy left to explore some new places for food, we decided to eat at Crazy Crabs at Arpora, which was on our way back from Baga to Casa Anjuna hotel.

The ambience of the place is not worth mentioning, however, the pleasant staff and the low priced scrumptious food is definitely worth mentioning.

Must try at Crazy Crabs- Crab Xacuti, Mushroom Masala and special mention Tandoori Roti.

Day 11- The final day of our holiday. Time to go back. The heart was divided between wanting to go back and to stay there but real life was beckoning. It was time to bid adieu to this dreamland. Since the last day too had to be special, our friends invited us for a hearty South Indian breakfast at their place before flying to Delhi. The wonderful hosts that they are, they weren’t hassled about feeding us a lavish spread at 8 in the morning even though it was Jyoti’s birthday. As if that wasn’t enough, I was handed over a tiffin box with some delicious PuranPoli inside. The last day of the holiday was converted into a mini celebration.

Rejuvenated, refreshed, satiated and extremely happy about getting such a relaxing break, we left Goa, with the promise of coming back soon. Adios, Goa. Wish to be there soon again.

Hate commenting!

Yes, I know what I'm writing about will set many tongues wagging....not because people sincerely feel for an issue, but because they enjoy hate commenting.

So welcome to this world where hate comments have become a regular feature, thanks to people who don't bat an eye lid before writing anything nasty about another person. Mostly these will be about issues which do not even remotely concern them nevertheless they will comment. And why will they comment??? Now that's the question, I've been looking for this answer myself for the past many days.

Let us pick a few incidents from the recent past.....

A two year old is pulled into water by an alligator near Orlando's Disneyland Resort and subsequently dies. Now what would you do in such a situation when parents are grieving the death of their little one? My natural instinct would be to join the grieving parents and either offer my condolences or just let them deal with the grief on their own.
FLASH!!! Here comes the battering army.....butcher the parents... crucify them! How could they be so careless? How could the boy get pulled by the alligator in the presence of the father? What was the mother doing? The parents killed their own child!
Oh c'mon, I say.....do u even know the background of the family? Do you know the parents personally? Are you aware that they were careless or not? Were you present at the site of accident?
Then how come.....just how come....can you say anything that comes to your mouth....err not say but type with your hands....those very hands which should have shook while typing such negative comments. Par kisee ka kya jaata hai? It was their child, not anyone else's....why should they bother about how the parents feel!!!
Who cares to know if the parents were the doting ones? Who cares if the mother had given up her career aspirations to take care of her child? Who cares if the father tried hard to keep the alligator at bay when it was pulling the child? Hell.....no one does.Type....send....and you're done for the day. Whether your negative comment has scarred someone for life is none of your concerns....you got your share of sadistic pleasure, that's it!

Next in line is our RBI governor's exit. Raghuram Rajan, a wonderful economist, who planned some great strategies for the country. Now he resigns...gives subtle hints as to what lead to his resignation.....and people join him in solidarity understanding his woes. Nothing wrong with that. A person has full rights to take a decision and people can stand by him and appreciate the work done by him during his tenure as RBI Governor....but hey! hey! Here come the slammers.....Why should we let anyone just leave gracefully...we ought to trash that person...that's our birth right!
And if that was not enough, we gotta batter those too who appreciate his work....take for example, actor Soha Ali Khan who tweeted in Raghuram Rajan's support....boy!!!! .....people who don't even know her hit her with some real nasty comments. One even went to the extent of asking her is she even knows the E of Economics....Well well my boy! How would you know that she has graduated from the prestigious London School of Economics and worked as an investment banker before she started acting? Wouldn't it be much better to concentrate on your studies/work before questioning other people's education? But then again......isn't trolling the best form of entertainment these days!!!

And now moving on to the latest one.....the one which involves controversy's own child....our very own, Salman Khan....
During a press conference, Salman stated that the shooting of Sultan involved kushti in the ring and after the shoot, he felt like a raped woman as he could not even walk properly.
Now.....agreed....this is not the best of statements one can make but certainly not the worst.
He compared his pain to the pain of a raped woman meaning he very well understands the plight of a raped woman and the pain she undergoes.It does not in anyway mean that he mocked at any woman who'd undergone the most horrible torture...rape.
Coming back to the same issue again.....why should we spare him cause he used the word RAPE!
It really doesn't matter how many times during college we said that the teacher raped us (if she asked too many questions we didn't have an answer to) or we said, my friends raped me today (if they picked up some point and zestfully kept poking fun at us the entire evening) or we said, the boss raped me yaar ( if the boss bombarded us with too much work to handle).....but yes! We are the simpletons. We can say anything and get away with it but when it involves someone else, we will charge towards them like a mad bull...err....I used a similie....now will I  get trolled for this? You never know.

So while I contemplate why people have this sadistic approach, you all can just take a chill pill....if you like something...like it.....if you don't....ignore it.
Why does everything have to be either liked or hated....can't there be a middle path? Can't a certain person have his or her own views over something? When we don't know the person in question, personally, then shouldn't we refrain from making such negative comments?  Who knows why, in what situation and exactly what that person said?
Isliye....khud jiyo....aur jeeney do! GET A LIFE !!!

Ciao folks!