“Why do you always stop me from doing things?”, “Why can’t I
stay up late at night?”, “Why can’t I play video games?”……These, and many more,
are the questions, I’m bombarded with, day in and day out.
Welcome to the world of motherhood!
At the age when girls are hanging around in college, going
out for parties, leading a completely carefree life; I chose motherhood. Yes, I
chose to be a mother when I twenty and by the time I turned twenty-one, I
proudly announced the arrival of my little cherub.
Tiny fingers, entwined in mine, that flaky skin peeling off,
that reddish fairish complexion….all made me fall in love with my little one
slowly and steadily. The first thought that comes to your mind when you see
your baby is, “How could I create a baby! A full human being…..a part of me!!!”
And once these overwhelming thoughts clear off, you start living each moment
with your baby.
My son was a perfectly happy baby, playful at all times and
happy to be in people’s company. Born in a joint setup, he had the pleasure of
getting abundant love from all quarters. Being the first baby at his maternal
side, he was the apple of everyone’s eyes there as well. His only crying moment
would come when he would be extremely hungry. Save that and you were spared the
wrath. However, he just wouldn’t want to sleep. And that my friends, was one
big problem. Not that he would be cranky, but just that he would be in no mood
to sleep at any time of the day or night.
The day was manageable, as he would keep playing merrily,
throwing his tiny hands and feet in the air initially, graduating to sitting on
the mat and playing with toys strewn all over, to walking around the house when
he was one. The only constraint if he took a rare siesta was that I had to be
around as even while sleeping, he would frequently open his eyes and if I was
seen, he would smile and sleep again instantly but if I wasn’t spotted in the
periphery of his bed, all hell would break loose and he would cry loudly.
Nights however, were nightmarish. With my hubby gone off to
sea for half of the year, I would be left alone to my own devices.
Sleeplessness was taking a toll me as my son would be up almost all night,
sleeping only for about half an hour to forty-five minutes at the max and then
waking up for another two hours before that half an hour relief came to me. My
father in law was a huge support as early in the morning, I would just hand my
son over to him after giving him a full feed and then the next four hours would
be spent with me being in divine sleep.
Counting a total of sleeping hours, my son would hardly
sleep for about 4-6 hours in a total of 24 hours and that too in breaks! God
alone knows how he managed all that energy and growth when all studies point
out to long hours of necessary sleep for infants. And since he would be up for
such long hours, he would be hungry all the time. To compensate for the extra
feeding, I had to introduce top feed every 4 hours, apart from breastfeeding
him every hour. So, day and night this cycle went on and on.
Then came his crawling stage. Lo and behold! Who on earth
would like to crawl? Since I’m baby strange due to my funny sleep pattern, I
ought to be different in this sphere as well. So, at the age of 7.5 months, he
got up with great difficulty, taking the help of two - thick but empty hard
cover files; and took his first five steps into this big world.
If a child chooses to straightaway graduate to walking
instead of crawling, there are bound to be difficulties. He was ecstatic that
he could do something different, so he would stand up all the time, try to walk
with his wobbly knees and in due course, make a mad dash to whichever place he
decided as his target and once very close to that place, his excitement would
get the better of him and he would fall with a thud. This had to be attended to
and so I would always stay on red alert and walk right behind him in a
squatting position with arms ready to clutch him in case he falls. This went on
for around 2 months, until he was about 10 months old and his walk had steadied
considerably.
Once he started walking, I had another challenge to face. As
soon as he wanted to pee at night, he would just get up without any warning in
the dark and start walking on the bed, towards I don’t know what! So even while
sleeping, I had to be alert to spring into action and hold his hand before he
falls off the bed with eyes shut.
His no sleep requirement activities went on till he turned 2
years old and then, as if some miracle occurred, he developed a better sleeping
pattern.
Looking back at that time, I always feel that had I chosen
motherhood at a later stage, I definitely wouldn’t have been able to manage
with him as I did at that time. Waking up almost round-the-clock, staying
active in whatever little sleep I could manage to walking behind him in a
crouching position so that he doesn’t fall and hit his head on the floor; this
just wouldn’t have been possible for me now.
Exhaustion sets in easily now and the knees seem to give
away if I try to squat…..not that I’m very old chronologically, but everybody’s
platter is so full with various things these days that we start feeling old at
a relatively young age.
I just turned 34 and my son is on the threshold of teenage.
He will enter his teens in March 2017. Now I have a different set of problems
to deal with. I started my article with his usual rants and those are just a
fraction of what I get to hear the whole day through. Not that he is a highly
disobedient child but the effect of teenage is surely brushing upon him
.
I can only thank my stars for facing this, and all that is
to come, at a comparatively younger age. It gives me jitters to think of how I
would have handled all this if I had to do so had I been in my forties.
Please note:
These are entirely my personal views based on my personal experiences. I do not
intend to hurt anyone’s sentiments with this writeup. There are many women
around me who have chosen motherhood at a later stage and are far better than
me at their job. A big hug for all the lovely mothers out there!
Foot note: My
hubby ensured that I didn’t get bogged down by motherhood pressures and
occasionally we did go out to the disc. (benefits of staying in a joint setup)
We went for a lot many outings and carried our son along almost everywhere. So,
I lived and loved life all this while.
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