Why RAPE?

Everyday when I open the morning newspaper, I look forward to reading some positive news....of our country creating a stir in the world, of some differently abled child performing wonders, some news item about the old world charm, or just anything which would please the eyes. What I get to read, is in stark contrast of what I expect. The newspaper is flooded with news of the most horrendous word in the dictionary of a woman, RAPE!

Rapes have been happening in India for a long time. One could start thinking that with increased awareness and education, we would start experiencing a decline in the rates of rapes. Alarmingly, nothing like that is happening. Seems, we're just going from bad to worse.
Years ago, in 1996, the rape and murder of a twenty-five year old, Law student,Priyadarshini Mattoo created a nationwide uproar. The rapist, Santosh Singh, was besotted with her and when she did not respond to his indecent proposals, he went to her house and butchered her. Later in the year 2012, the case of Nirbhaya caused a media frenzy with protestors taking to the street to demonstrate against the heinous act, demanding the harshest of punishment for the cruel perpetrators. It was a gang rape in the ugliest form ever.
Earlier this year, all the newspapers and social media were splattered with the face of an innocent little, eight year old child who's innocence had been brutally stamped all over by some men who claimed to be serving God! Shockingly some sickos, termed this as a political matter of the minorities trying to gain attention. Then came the news of seven-ten year olds being continuously raped by the owner of the same shelter home, that they were staying in. In both the above cases, irony was at its best or shall I say, worst form. The servants of God must in no way be pleasing God, by indulging in such an act. On the other hand, the same person who provided the so called 'shelter' to the little girls was playing with their life in a place they called 'home'!

As if this wasn't enough, I woke up to another shocking news which I'm sure must have sent everyone into a tizzy. A pregnant goat was gang-raped!!! The world is definitely heading towards doomsday!
Just when my son remarked how bad it was that women were being raped everyday in some or the other corner of India, he flipped through the newspaper and stared at me in horror!!! Glaring at him was the news of a grade 11 boy, being raped by six grade 12 hostelers!
What plays in the minds of rapists?
This question has been haunting me ever since I heard the word 'RAPE' as a child. I think this is the worst nightmare for every girl/woman. Why only women actually! The boys aren't safe either.
When people rape, doesn't there conscience prick them for even a second? When you look at little girls and boys, all you can think of is their cuteness and your heart just overflows with tender love for them. Then what makes these monsters lust for these little ones? What arouses the beast in them? What ceases to work in their mind that they get so blinded and don't see reason? Forcing yourself upon someone and feeling all powerful! Isn't that gross!
Thankfully, growing up in the hills, we were far safer than girls all over the country. We only started feeling a little unsafe when during the late nineties,Nainital started experiencing an influx of so called 'tourists' who probably just came over looking for some cheap thrills during the summer season.



Now I'm a middle aged woman but this fear continues to grip me. Every lonely stretch of road, every dark alley, every uncomfortable stare, all are enough to send shivers down my spine. I feel for the scores of victims, who've been scarred for life. So many are brave and come back to life, stronger than ever before while there are many who have been forever lost into the darkness. 

Age is just a number......IS IT?

Remember the time when we were kids? Every birthday used to be so special. It would be a much awaited event and the countdown would begin months in advance. As a child, I was particularly fond of red colour, so on every birthday, year after year, all I wanted to wear on my special occasion was, a red frilly frock. 

The guest list would be drafted and the invitees would depend upon my mood as to who had been good to me through the year and who'd been mean. The menu, the games and the distribution of sweets in school, it was all much looked forward to and why not? It used to be the most special day. 

That day when people asked me how old I had turned, I would be delighted to announce that I'd turned a year older, my head held high and my entire being swelling with pride on climbing one more number on the age step ladder! 

Things have changed now. Though I'm still proud of my growing age yet the thing that's vanished is the enthusiasm. I don't quite relate to it anymore. Of course, it still makes me happy when friends and family from far and near give me a phone call but yeah, that sheen of childhood is not there. Somehow down the years, we become subdued beings. 

I've totally accepted the fact that I'm growing older and wiser ;-)

At the same time, I have seen a lot many women quite hesitant to reveal their age and I fail to completely understand why! Is it that they don't want to be labelled as OLD, is it that they don't want to appear charmless, or is there some completely hidden reason which I am unable to figure out? 

Few days ago, a show on TV caught my fancy! My son told me about a show wherein, the lead was a 40 year old woman, recently divorced and absolutely broke. She has a daughter who is studying in another country. Since the woman is in dire need of money, she goes on to apply for a job at various places and is turned down because of her advanced age. She has the qualification and the zeal to work yet she fails to procure a job and that's just because she is 40! While sitting in a bar and sulking about this fact, she meets a guy in his twenties who seems to be taken by her charm. When she tries to thwart his advances by telling him that he's way too young for her, he states that he's in his twenties and that she could be just a year or two here and there. 

This statement amuses the woman's friend who overhears the conversation and advises this woman to actually rework a little on her hair and wardrobe and pretend to be 20! She reluctantly agrees and voila! It just works for her. She immediately gets a job and a set of young friends, all in their twenties. Basically, her life takes off and she's able to rediscover herself and be happier as her financial woes are over.

So though I haven't watched the show further to know whether she's able to successfully manage or her cover gets blown, yet the concept of the show made me opine that age perhaps is not just a number. The society completely turns away from older women and in a bid to save their career they might have to be hesitant about mentioning their age. 

Therefore, the next time, I meet someone who doesn't want to reveal her age, maybe I can keep aside the famous saying, 'What's in the age? It's just a number.' Well....IS IT???

Summer Time...Fun Time...Means Grandparents' Time!

It’s that time of the year again when the temperatures are soaring high. Birds, animals and humans alike are moving around to quench their thirst. The fans whirl lazily and seem to throw a gust of hot air. Ice cream vendors, sherbet vendors and gola vendors are enjoying the limelight while all other vendors enviously look on, desperate for some customers to come their way. The sweltering heat gives no respite to anyone. Everyone curses the heat as they go about their daily chores but there are some, who love this time….who wait for this time the whole year round. Any guesses??? Well, you guessed it right! It’s the little ones who get a long respite from school, but there are some others, who too wait for this time and probably even more eagerly than the kids. They are the lovely GRANDPARENTS!

With silver in their hair and gold in their hearts, they wait for this time with baited breath as they get to see their treasures after a long wait of eleven months. Children are the ones whom parents love the most but once the grandkids arrive, those very children who had until then been the apple of their parents’ eyes, take a backseat and the world of the grandparents start revolving around them.

Spending the entire summer vacations with grandparents, well in my case winter vacations (as we never got any holidays during the summer) was a customary in our times. As soon as the holidays would begin, my mom would pack our bags and baggage and off we would go for three months straight! Yes! We had three months of vacation. One month was spent at our paternal grandparents’, the other at our maternal grandparents’ and the remaining one month hopping around at the houses of our uncles and aunts. The memories of those days still bring a flash of smile on my face.

Being able to visit grandparents is a boon. What children need most, are the essential things which the grandparents have in abundance. They give unconditional love, comfort, joy, kindness, understanding, patience, important life lessons and best of all they can be the children’s friend and confidante. Children can uninhibitedly share their life stories with their grandparents. Since they are already out of the stressful phase of parenting, they are more fun to be with. They will listen to all that you have to say, without dismissing you, without being judgemental and without bringing ‘studies’ in every conversation unlike parents :-D

Just like their hearts, their kitchen is always open. They are certainly more talented than their own kids. The delicacies they dish out for their grandkids are remembered even when they are long gone. Even today my friends and me remember, the multiple fold ‘teh’ ka crisp paratha my maternal grandfather used to make and the tasty pickles and papads my grandmother used to pack for us. Now that same role has been taken over by my own mother who ensures to cook things for her beloved grandson. The planning begins months in advance and they start ticking off days on the calendar. I recall one episode when I was travelling home to my parents by Shatabdi and my excited little boy, all of 2, was hopping around the coach, merrily chatting with complete strangers and telling them that his waiting nanimaa had prepared Rajma for him. Simple joys of childhood!

Need I mention the wonderful gifts grandparents carefully preserve for their grandchildren all through the year, neatly and carefully tucked away and produced only when the grandkids are sitting on their lap. The sparkling eyes of the grandparents as they watch their grandkids unwrapping the gifts, and the twinkling eyes of the grandkids when they open their gifts only to discover the things they had longed for at the market while the parents had gently whisked them away!

What about the hand knitted sweaters and dresses that are so lovingly made by them? They still out beat the most expensive pullovers available in the market as they carry the warmth of grandmother’s love.

Amidst today’s busy schedules, it’s getting more and more difficult for kids to spend their vacations in their grandparents’ houses, but one thing can be assured, that if parents send their kids over, children will definitely have the best time of their lives. They will not miss their parents at all as they will be showered with extra love and care.

So, my dear parents. Don’t think much. Instead of just taking your kids to some exotic location this time, pack them away to their grandparents’ house. It will be a double delight – both for your kids and for your parents.

Circus....A dying art!

Not long ago, circus was a major form of entertainment all over the world. For years, Indians enjoyed the circus in its myriad hues. The 1970 movie, Mera Naam Joker, by the famous actor, Raj Kapoor showcases the world of circus. It brings to light the fact that no matter what goes on in the personal life of a performer, the show must go on.

During my recent visit to my parents in Dehradun, I got to know that the iconic Parade Ground was hosting ‘Raymon Circus’. The posters caught my eye, and memories of childhood flashed in my mind, when our parents used to take us to the circus. At that time, circus was considered HUGE! It would be advertised long before it came visiting the town. People would enthusiastically wait for that day, they would excitedly wander around as the circus staff pitched the tents and once the show timings were put up, they would restlessly queue up to buy tickets to watch their favourite acts. Circus was held in much awe at that time.

Fast forward to today’s time. Today there are so many forms of entertainment available for children. The most important being the infamous video games which have taken away the simple joys of childhood from every child’s life. I better not start getting on with it, else I’ll end up writing the entire article about how annoying these gadgets are!

Well, coming back to the topic, as soon as I saw the posters of Raymon Circus, I decided to take my son for a circus show. I felt it was the right age for him to know about this art. Having travelled to various countries at a very young age like most children of today and having watched so many art forms of various countries, I wasn’t certain that he would enjoy this particular thing but I had nothing to loose. So, three generations - my mom, my son and me, set out to enjoy an evening show! The senior most generation had numerous memories, the middle generation had a few of them and the youngest generation had absolutely no clue of what was in store.

As we took our seats, the first item of the show was announced. It was my personal favourite, The Trapeze. Now there’s something quite captivating about the art. The trapeze is a horizontal bar hanging by two ropes and free to swing, used by acrobats in a circus. They hang onto the bars, swing in the air,take some twists and them comfortably grapple onto another suspended trapeze. This act has always enamoured me and I watch it with baited breath. The coordination between the two artists as to when one of them will leave her/his trapeze and as she/he swings in the air, the other artist on the other trapeze, mostly hanging upside down, catches hold of the arms of that artist. It is totally amazing to witness this act! Every time they did this successfully, we cheered and clapped.

The next few items included the rope acts by performers from Uzbekistan, in which the artist would swing around the rope, go up, come down and perform miraculous acts with dignified ease. Another was an act where a performer, enticed the audience by swinging thirty hoops around her waist all at the same time without even a single one falling. Then she twisted her waist, went upside down, picked up the bow and arrow with her toes and in an inverted position, performed archery! This act left every single person in the audience completely spellbound.

Another act included artists from Thailand in which they performed some scary acts by putting not one but five, twenty inches knives inside their mouth. The audience watched with gasps when they made an artist lie on the floor, blindfolded his partner, put a cucumber on the navel of the artist on the floor which his partner was supposed to chop off without of course injuring his partner. The audience had mixed reactions, some shut their eyes, some cheered, some watched in stunned silence. As the artist cut off the cucumber with one brisk stroke, the audience was definitely relieved. They performed more such acts and much to my relief, finished their acts soon.

As the background staff dextrously cleared the stage setting between various acts, the jokers did the filler acts. Looking at the shabby clothes and their sad eyes, as they joked about and people laughed at them, I was instantly transported to the movie, where Raj Kapoor, who was a joker in Gemini Circus, had to make people laugh, no matter how much sadness engulfed his heart.

One more act which left us completely stunned was when a performer drank almost half a bucket of water, topped it up with concentrates of red and green colour and then took out a fountain of first green colour and then of red colour. It was mesmerising to see how he could manage to keep the two colours segregated inside his stomach or wherever he was retaining it , and then shoot out different coloured fountains!

A few more acts of a girl balancing on a rope, and then putting a row of cups and saucers by picking up from one toe, throwing it up in the air and then efficiently placing it on the head without using her hand was certainly wonderful. Since acts by animals have been banned now on account of animal cruelty , there was just one act in which parrots performed some cute synchronised acts.

The show ended after almost two hours of performances. Each act left us speechless. We were dumbfounded by the skills of the artists. As opposed to my expectation, my son thoroughly enjoyed every moment. After every act he stated how staggeringly talented these artists were and how much more recognition they deserved. I felt a quiet satisfaction as I’d made my son witness a stupendous art and he had not failed to recognise and appreciate it. Three generations who had entered the circus tent with different expectations came out with the same emotion. We had unanimously enjoyed THE CIRCUS!

No matter how old I become, I will always need you

It is said that life comes a full circle. We enter this world as tiny frail things, completely dependent on others for our needs. When we grow old, we are in the same condition. Our body becomes frail and we again become dependent upon others.

The recent happenings around me have made me reflect upon this aspect of life. Over the last few months, my friends have been losing their parents at a steady rate and this has left me completely shaken! I have been compelled to think, ‘Are we already this old that we are being deprived of our parents?’ There have been times in the past when my friends have lost their parents to cruel fate but that was untimely and extremely unfortunate. However, when you start confronting this situation on a regular basis, it kind of leaves you jolted.

My dad retired from work three years ago. He has been the epitome of the saying ‘MY DADDY STRONGEST’. A man, who could lift up any amount of weight with comfortable ease, work endlessly and tirelessly yet never complain. He’s been there for us always, ready to comfort us, to save us from the wrath of our mom and to give us a warm hug whenever we needed him. Even today, when he sees me stressed out, he just wants to do anything to ease out my agony.

Wait! Don’t start believing this to be another ‘Father’s Day’ tribute. It’s nothing like that cause the same goes for my mom as well. She definitely is not the strongest woman in the physical sense of the world yet she is extremely strong mentally. Her strong will power, her endurance powers, her congenial attitude and her zest for life, all these certainly make her a force to reckon with.

So, my parents, though poles apart in nature and temperament, make a wonderful couple and set some real relationship goals for us. This post however, is nothing about that.

I’m writing this because I am disturbed to see how life took a turn once my dad turned sixty. A perfectly fit and strong man, who seemed unperturbed with anything happening around him, suddenly got engulfed in a series of physical troubles.

I have been witnessing his woes for three years now. One thing gets over, and another thing starts. It’s almost like a continuous battle wherein my dad has to come to the forefront and one by one combat different enemies. My mom hasn’t been doing well either.

My parents are vegetarians, have simple food- not the oily friend meals, are teetotallers, go for regular walks, stay physically active, get their annual checkups done, aren’t obese, are non diabetic and keep all other parameters in control. This sounds too good for their age, doesn’t it? Ironically, it is not.

Despite maintaining a perfectly healthy lifestyle, they both faced heart issues and had to undergo angioplasty.

Shocking! Itsn’t it? Well it shocked everyone within their close circle as they’ve been a much celebrated couple among their peers. People look up to them but these bouts of illnesses have shaken the faith of everyone around them. As for my sis and me, we find it hard to believe that those same people who have been our strentgh always have become so frail themselves. We know they are ageing, we ourselves are not growing younger but somehow I think, we children become too selfish. We want our parents to be there always around us.

I must give my parents hundred marks for being super brave. Despite being unwell, they never let us feel their pain. Knowing our busy schedules, they try and manage everything on their own. Quite often we are not even aware of the health issues they are facing. Often we as kids, are not able to be there for them when they need us. We feel guilty but they affectionately tell us that we need to be there for our kids and not feel guilty about them.

Their three grandkids totally adore them. Our parents play with them, have fun with them, cook for them and go out for walks with them.

I want these kids to have beautiful memories of their grandparents. I want them to stay fit to continue playing with them. I want them to get rid of the illnesses which keep surrounding them every now and then.

If only we had any control over these things......I WISH.....

As I write this, I say a quiet prayer in my heart.

My anguish as a mother enclosed in a letter.

Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis said, "If you bungle raising your children, I don't think whatever else you do well, matters very much.”

I am a 35-year-old lady and mother to a 14-year-old boy. Phew!

Sounds tough to me… Why? Because, I’m not just being able to handle it!

Lame, isn’t it? I chose motherhood for myself and seriously, I have no regrets about that. Being a mother to an adorable boy has fulfilled me in every way… The only problem is that I’m not being able to cope with it now. Actually, I sound quite confused to myself when I’m writing this.

On one hand, I’m saying ‘motherhood’ is the most beautiful thing and on the other, I’m citing my inability at handling it. Well, I think ‘motherhood’ is beautiful, but it’s just that I’m not a good mother.

My son is a teenager and you’ve often heard about teenage. Been there, done that! You know how it is… How everyone blames teenage for being the root cause of all problems. Really, is it? You know what I think, there is nothing as ‘bad children’, it’s only our incapability at taking stock of the situation and addressing it properly that makes them appear like that.

My son is a wonderful child, more or less an ideal child. He is a decent kid, doesn’t appear to be having any bad habits, is quite agreeable (when you allow him to play video games to his heart’s content). Then where does the problem lie?

I think the problem lies in me, in not being able to convince him that video games do not form the crux of life! That life is not tied to video games, and there’s much more out there in the world. I’m unable to convince him that studying is his primary job as a kid, and that there aren’t supposed to be any bribes (in the form of video games) for doing your regular work!

My son is an introvert and I’m an extrovert, which sufficiently proves why I fail to understand him at times. While I can gel in with people at the drop of a hat, my son is completely not interested in making friends too soon. Too soon... Why? He’ll take years to make friends if he doesn’t exactly find the type of person who matches his type. Nothing wrong with that I think, but I feel upset about it as I feel that it makes him lonely.

I chose motherhood as my primary job all these years. I didn’t take up any full-time job, so that I could be with him consistently. Even now, I’m a teacher who gets back home before him, so that he doesn’t come back to an empty home. But still, I’m considerably going wrong somewhere. Even though I’m around him all the time, I’m not being able to get things right. THIS really hurts me.

My son loves me like anything. I’m the centre of his world, he tells me that, and I do believe in it. Then what’s bothering me? I don’t really know!

My son is an extremely sharp kid and so, his span of attention is quite less. He easily gets bored of things, but when I see him hooked onto the video game for hours (if you don’t say anything to him), then I get upset.

I believe he can do remarkably well in academics, but he’s not putting the desired effort. Am I over expecting? Am I being a typical mom? Am I pressurizing him? Or, am I just not understanding the situation at all?

Questions and questions, to which, I don’t seem to have any answers. People around me advise me on going easy, my husband tells me to approach the situation sensibly, but I seem to have completely lost it. At times I think who’s the kid? He seems to be quite clear as to what he wants, while I seem to be the cry baby who does nothing but whine!

As of now, I’m in a completely weirdo zone. Nothing I’m doing seems right. My biggest fear… I shouldn’t be a failure as a mom, but right now I feel like one lost mom.

Maika trip is the best!

"Mom....Dad, I've booked my tickets to come home on the 29th of this month." I chirpily told my parents over a video call. I could see the excitement evidently running through the entire conversation that ensued. After a long time I was going to my parents' house for a month long vacation. Sometimes I wouldn't be available during the summer break and sometimes they would be travelling, so it hadn't really worked out.As I hung up the phone, I started thinking of all the things I would do once I reach there. As a responsible and concerned daughter, my thoughts immediately wandered to the kitchen. I started thinking of how I would immediately relieve my mom of the kitchen duties and take over. Then plans of catching up with school friends, eating out at my favourite joints, going for scooty rides on my favourite road of the town, etc took over.

Every day my parents would tell me of the countdown that they had already started as soon as I had informed them. It was charming to see them so happy and enthused. However as the day of my departure started setting in, my heart started sinking. Locking the house and going away for an entire month! ( My husband had gone sailing)

Oh! What would happen when I'm not around? What if a major storm came? What if something required immediate attention which I would not be able to take care of while I am away? So many 'what if's' started floating in my mind.

Nervously albeit happily I left for my hometown on the designated day. As my son and me boarded the train, there was a big smile on my face. I was going home after all. From one home to another, the one I've known as home since childhood. Amidst the breakfast, tea, wafers and the hourly calls my dad would make, to enquire as to where the train had reached, we arrived at our destination. For the first time, dad was not at the station to welcome us with his open arms as he had just undergone angioplasty. Nevertheless we hailed a cab and reached home taking in the familiar sights and sounds as we drove.

The grand and responsible 'taking over kitchen duties' thoughts melted away as soon as I hugged my mom. I knew she would manage everything. ( evil me ;-)) There is nothing as welcoming as coming home to mom-cooked meals and nothing matches the live conversations, even when you have been video chatting frequently. So I was all settled in, comfy and relaxed. I think no matter how grown up we are, we tend to become babies as soon as we come to our parents' house. At least I do :-D

Then started sessions of catching up with friends and cousins, going to favourite food joints, exploring the new places that had popped up in town, watching movies with mom in the tiny neighbourhood multiplex, going for long un-targeted scooty rides, showing my son how we would ride the scooty on neutral on the sloped roads of the town, soaking in the beauty of the place, complaining about how hot it had started getting even here, only to be immediately blown away by a cool spell of rain showers.....jotting down everything is really not possible here. Days seemed to be flying!

And the the other countdown started. This time it was about me going back from this home to that one. Again, the nervousness and sadness started engulfing. The thoughts of going back to work and shouldering all the responsibilities at home weren't very welcoming.

But then again, this is what life is about. When we grow up, we fly out of our parents' nest and build our own. Our parents did this, then we did it and later our kids will do the same.

So, now it's time to once again fly out of my parents' nest and take charge of my own. The stay here has been wonderful. "I'll come back again soon my lovelies," I tell my parents, knowing well enough that it won't really be possible for another one year but signing off on a happy note makes me happy and hopeful.

Nothing matches the pleasure of coming to your parents' home.

Maika trip is simply the best :-)

Aren't the summer holidays over a tad too soon?

"Yay! It's finally May!" My son and me screamed at the dawn of the first day of May. May is special and why shouldn't it be? The much awaited summer break starts in May. That perhaps can be called the happiest month of the year as we prepare for our holiday season. 

Then came June.....an entire month of freedom from waking up in the morning. The best way to celebrate holidays is to snuggle in bed in the mornings when the AC seems to have suddenly become more powerful and you want to pull the quilt and sleep for some more time. You don't need to listen to the irritating music of the alarm which even though you set as the sweetest music available in the world but at that unearthly hour, seems to be the harshest sound your ears have ever heard. You don't have to hit the snooze button and keep taking sneak peeks at the clock to see how many more minutes or say seconds can you still steal. It's the most blissful thing to do. Sleep....without the stress of waking up cause you DO NOT have to send off the kids to school. 

Fast forward to the first day of July. Sadness enveloped the entire household. We felt as if someone was snatching away our beloved from us. Taking the liberty of going to the extremes, this pain can certainly be compared to the pain of a mother when someone forcefully snatches her baby from her bosom. As the school reopening time inched closer, our steps became heavier. The whole world seemed dismal! Hadn't the holidays gotten over a tad too soon? 

First day of school! The boy goes to school expecting no studies on the first day but comes back sulking as to what kind of people do they have in school! So much work done on the very first day!!!

Now life's back on track. The same old routine starts. Life seems monotonous and boring. Then time slowly passes and you get used to this mundane life. Weekend seems to be the best bet and you eagerly wait for the five long days to pass. Longingly we look at the calendar and count the holidays remaining in the year and then become happy to see that the short winter break is just 6 months away. The feeling is like "doobte ko tinkey ka sahaara."

At the end of every summer break, I find myself asking. "Why? Dear God, why? Why do the holidays get over so soon???"

Is it just me or do you all feel the same way too?

Bewitching Bali

BEWITCHING BALI!

Sun, sand, surf, rain and the lovely greens……that is Bali, a small island in the country of Indonesia which can aptly be called one of its most beautiful islands. Some sources say it is a part of the Indian Ocean while others claim it to be a part of the Pacific Ocean. Well whichever ocean it is a part of, there is one fact which is undeniable and that is BALI IS STUNNING!

Since we can be referred to as water babies, as the three of us are madly in love with the beaches, whenever there’s a holiday plan, our first thought always goes to the sea. Keeping in sync with this thought, this time it had to be Bali. Bali was long due for us but something or the other was always coming in the way and this time too it was the eruption of Mt. Agung, which was sending us into a tizzy and making us contemplate on our decision. Yet, we decided to take a risk, and today, as I sit down to write this article, I’m so glad we ignored the unnecessary media hype and went on with our holiday. 

27^th December 2017 – We left for the airport in the evening and flew out a couple of hours later.

   Ngurah Rai International Airport, Bali

28^th December 2017- Welcome to Bali!!! The joy of landing in Bali cannot be explained. We were so happy to have finally made it to Bali. We exchanged some money for local currency and then came out of the airport to look for a taxi and there, the fooling started. All sorts of taxi drivers kept coming to us, quoting a huge amount of money to take us to our hotel, which was barely 8 km away. We booked an Uber cab and were continuously mocked at by the local taxi mafia that uber would not come to the airport as its banned and we would be stranded. Irritated by the smirks of the local taxi mafia, we decided to walk out a bit and look for an alternative arrangement. Meanwhile, our uber cabbie was in constant touch with us over Whatsapp but language barrier was proving to be a problem. Eventually we walked out a little and took the help of a local to call the cabbie and ask him to come to that location. That kind man did so and voila! Our taxi was there within no time!

Just when we thought, our little ordeal was over, we were in for a shock. We had quite often heard that traffic in that area is maddening but we weren’t prepared for a three-hour journey to cover a distance of JUST 8 kms. Phew!!! We were completely drained out with hunger and tiredness by the time we reached our hotel in Legian. We checked into our cute little property and decided to take a dip in the pool while eating from the poolside hotel restaurant. After some relaxation, we headed to explore the area, which was buzzing with activity. Cafes, bars, massage parlours and shops selling touristy stuff flanked the roads. It was a wonderful sight. We strolled around the area, had a sumptuous dinner and hit bed.

29^th December 2017- This was the day we had reserved for visiting the world-famous sites of Bali – The Tanah Lot Temple and the Uluwatu Temple. 

After an early breakfast at the hotel, our cabbie picked us up and drove us to the Tanah Lot temple, which is known for its enchanting seaside setting. It’s a beautiful ancient Hindu shrine, perched on a tiny hillock with crashing waves. It is famous for its picturesque sunset and is a photographer’s delight as one can watch the sun melt over the horizon. We of course had two places to choose for our sunset and so after a day visit to Tanah Lot, made our way to the famous Uluwatu Temple. The drive was again way longer than it should have been due to the messy traffic. 

Uluwatu temple is a sacred Hindu cliff-top temple blessed by panoramic view of the Indian Ocean, dramatic Kecak Dance and romantic sunset in the south part of Bali. It is one of the nine directional temples of Bali meant to protect it from evil. The temple is perched at a staggeringly steep cliff as tall as 70m over the roaring Indian Ocean waves.  An important thing to note is that nobody can enter this place without wearing a sarong/lungi. You can pick up your purple lungis for free from a designated spot and then drop them back when you return from the temple tour. 

After a casual stroll around the temple complex, we bought our tickets for the Kecak dance, which is a short depiction of Ramayana. The setting sun and the crowded amphitheater present a perfect setting for the performance which is marked by no background music or conversation but just by the rhythmic chorus sung by 70 men who breathlessly keep taking out sounds while the actors perform mutely. It is amazing to see how the 70 men go on chanting without taking any break for over an hour of the performance! 

                                                                                           

                 Tanah Lot                                           Uluwatu Temple

 

As the show ended, we headed for our waiting taxi as we now wanted to head to Jimbaran beach for a lavish dinner! Navigating our way through the crowds, we reached JBS (Jimbaran Bay Seafood Club). It’s a perfect beach restaurant where you can have loads of seafood while a band of musicians go from table to table, asking people their nationalities and trying to sing a song in their language. We were delighted to hear them sing “Tum paas aaye, yun muskuraaye”. 

It was a lovely way to end a rather exhausting day!

 

Exotic dinner and music at Jimbaran Bay Seafood Club

Tanah Lot entry: 60 thousand rupiah (IDR) per person

Uluwatu temple entry: 30 thousand rupiah (IDR) per person

Kecak/Fire dance entry: 1 hundred thousand/1 lakh rupiah (IDR) per person

30^th December- A day for some local shopping and walking around as the previous day had been pretty exhausting. We walked around the lanes of Legian and Kuta area buying some souvenirs and soaking in the local sights. Krisna Oleh Oleh Khas a nice place to buy souvenirs. We then had some lunch and then went to the hotel to take some rest. After an hour we decided to walk around the beach. The Kuta-Legian-Double Six beaches are all interconnected and one can easily start walking from one and reach the other. 

The waves in this area of Bali are good for surfing and they rise high enough for a surfer’s delight. One can spot many surfers enjoying themselves in this area. However, what disappointed us immensely was these beaches were extremely dirty with filth everywhere. That was rather an unpleasant sight. Having dinner at a beachside restaurant, we headed back to the hotel.

         Legian Beach

31^st December- The last day of the year 2017!!! The day was cloudy and the weather prediction stated non-stop rain from 1700 hrs onwards. We decided to hit the beach so that we could take one dip in the sea for the last time in the year 2017 but as soon as we entered the waters, it started raining heavily. Nevertheless, we braved the rain for some time and splashed around but were soon annoyed with the garbage that was coming floating to us, so decided to move out. Our hotel was just about five minutes-walk from the beach, so we walked up to the hotel, took a warm bath and spent the rest of the day, munching on snacks and having lunch in the beautiful balcony of our room. It kept raining and we were just hoping that the rain should stop and not ruin our New Year’s Eve in Bali.  At 1800 hours the rain was reduced to a drizzle and it finally ended. We rejoiced and got ready to spend the last evening of the year in high spirits!

As soon as we were out of the hotel, we were in for a pleasant surprise. The entire coastline was brightened up with fireworks going up non-stop and illuminating the night sky. We walked all along the coastline, enjoying the fireworks while grooving to the music of the street side bars and cafes, all bustling with activity! After about half an hour of walk, we arrived at Double Six beach. This was the place we had chosen to bring in the New Year 2018. 

The mad party scene

We were welcomed at the beach party of the B9B café. The sight was a musical riot! There was some awesome music with people dancing and drinking. The party fever was running high. We had a couple of drinks, swayed to the music, had dinner and then as the clock struck 12, the entire area was in a trance! Fireworks, lanterns, music, joyous people…..it seemed to be the most beautiful way to ring in the new year!!!

1^st Jan 2018- The first day of the New Year and we were all set to leave Legian for our next destination, Ubud. As it was a bright and beautiful morning, we went to the beach before heading to Ubud to sip some cool coconut water! I must say, it was the best coconut water I ever had in life, sweet, refreshing and the quantity, well, more than the double of what we get in India!

We travelled on the busy roads towards Ubud and again it took way more time than it should have. The saving grace was lunch at a family run restaurant where I entered the kitchen and got food made as per my taste buds. For the seafood lovers, the squid/Calamari/Cumi cumi was a soul stirring food.  Ubud is a quaint little area, which gives you the feeling of a hill station. The place is dotted with cute cafes, which are an absolute marvel. Since we reached late, we just had enough time for some evening photography, some shopping and a lavish dinner at The Legend Café. 

The architecture of Ubud is stunning and it can rightfully be called the cultural capital of Bali. 

Rice field outside our hotel                The Legend Cafe

2^nd Jan 2018- The next morning, we set out early for the famous rice terraces as we wanted to avoid the flocking crowds and the locals troubling you for donation while totally ruining your experience. Hailing from the hills, the rice terraces seemed quite normal to me but people find them to be quite spectacular so I shouldn’t be saying much about that. We didn’t take much time, climbing the terraces and then coming down. As we sat in the cab, our cabbie suggested taking us to Uma Pakel. This place has large swings, suspended from large coconut trees and the experience is definitely thrilling! Our son loved the swinging and added one more thrill to his big running list!

        Rice Terrace, Ubud                                  Swings at Uma Pakel

Another attraction of this place is the coffee and tea sampling. You need to buy a cup of coffee to be able to sample 15 assorted flavors of tea and coffee. This experience is highly recommended as it tantalizes your taste buds and leaves you yearning for more. The highlight is the cup of coffee you order. It is none other than the famous LUWAK coffee made from the droppings of Asian Palm Civet. It is the most expensive coffee of the world.  Kopi Luwak, or civet coffee, is coffee that includes part-digested coffee cherries eaten and defecated by the Asian Palm Civet. Producers of the coffee beans argue that the process improves the coffee by two mechanisms- selection and digestion.

     Tea and Coffee samplers

Cost of a cup of Luwak coffee- 50 thousand IDR

Swinging charges- 1 hundred 50 thousand IDR

The next stop was the sacred monkey forest of Ubud. It is a beautiful forest cum temple, which is home to hordes of grey long-tailed Macaques. The entire complex is flooded with loads of friendly monkeys/macaques who will climb upon your head or back and still not hurt you. Feed them with bananas that are sold all over inside the complex and they will be happy to come to you. The sculptures all around the forest are covered with a layer of beautiful green moss, rendering the area the look of an archaeological site. 

Once out from this place, we were terribly hungry and so went to a picturesque restaurant set amidst paddy fields – Bebek Tebasari Restaurant.  The food was an eye candy and the complimentary drink shots and beetroot wafers added to the charm of the place.

                 

        

           Monkey Forest          Your very own rice bowl                                                     

Tummies full and hearts contented, we headed to the Bali Bird Park as the bird lover, my husband, Ashish, had to be there at any cost!

The entry ticket was a little over-priced but once inside the place, we did not regret it a bit. I can easily say that it’s the best bird park I have ever been to. No other place has given us the opportunity to have such an up-close and personal rendezvous with these exotic birds from all over the world!!! These colourful beauties just sit around so relaxed even though there are numerous people around them. They are a pleasure to watch and they pose merrily for you. A number of bird shows take place and our son, Ansh, volunteered for these shows. The most awesome experience was having the Brahminy Kite swooping down on Ansh’s head to pick up its prey, which had been placed there!

We had various bird comfortably perched on our arms and head while we happily and excitedly posed for pictures. 

Ashish, the photographer, couldn’t contain his excitement on getting to click such breathtakingly beautiful birds!

Bali Bird Park

The super contented day ended with some dinner at The Paon Café in Ubud. For desserts, we went to Tuckies, a cozy coconut place, which has some wonderful coconut desserts to offer. 

Monkey Forest ticket- 50000 IDR Per Person

Bird Park Ticket – 385,000 IDR Per Person

3^rd Jan- After a cultural bonanza in Ubud, we drove to Candidassa on the 3^rd. For the first time, traffic did not bother us and we reached our destination well in time. This property exceeded our expectations in every manner for it was located at the beach with a tiny stretch of absolutely virginal beach completely at its disposal, a sea side restaurant with waves crashing against its walls, a garden dotted with cottages and coconut trees and a pool facing the expanse of the sea with ships anchored at a distance! My words definitely cannot do justice to the magnanimity of that place. Its beauty is indescribable. 

Our lovely resort in Candidassa

Candidassa isn’t a happening place at all but I would call our stay at Candidassa, the best leg of our holiday. We spent the rest of the day lapping in the sea and the pool. 

4^th Jan- The day started with a walk along the beach, lazing on the sun beds, taking a dip in the pool and having a hearty meal. 

We had heard a lot about the Pasir Putih Beach, also known as the virgin beach, so even though we didn’t want to leave the property and go anywhere yet we decided to go for a short visit. This beach is beautiful but is a long drive inside from the main road and then is plagued by mafia, which asks you for an entry fee. My husband demanded an ID card, which they of course didn’t have as they were operating illegally in that area, fleecing unsuspecting tourists, so he had a slight altercation with the man but eventually we walked across to the beach. Since it was already late in the evening and also drizzling, we decided to go back early and then again enjoy the scenic beauty from our resort. 

The day ended as prettily as it had started.

5^th Jan-  Our delightful stay at Candidassa came to an end as we moved to our last destination in Bali – Sanur! 

The drive from Candidassa to Sanur was also smooth and wasn’t plagued with traffic. We checked into our hotel, which was located right in the busy Sindhu area of Sanur. The hotel owner welcomed us warmly.  After a little chit chat with him, we walked to Sindhu beach to grab some lunch. The best street food was available there at ‘Amphibia Warung’. The boys chose their fish, squid and prawns and ate a hearty meal only to return in the evening to dine on some fish, crab and octopus!

 

The amazing variety is enough to set any seafood lover drooling!

6^th Jan- We had set this day aside for the world-famous Balinese massage. First, we pampered ourselves with some warm-stone-massage. The bliss one experiences while getting this massage is certainly out of this world! After getting our muscles flexed it was time for some yummy pizza at Segara, the seaside restaurant and bar, which is a community run restaurant, the proceeds of which go to the welfare of Sanur area. The pizzas were freshly done and we relished them while it rained heavily all the time. After lunch, we bonded over a game of darts and pool at the restaurant itself. 

The Sindhu night market is also quite famous. It has about 15 food carts placed in an area, which provide superb local food at very cheap prices. It is quite a hit with the tourists and so while the boys ate at the ‘Wicked Parrot café’, I saved my appetite for some local fare. The Indonesian Omelette is indeed superb and there’s an old man, who sells fried fritters/pakodas of various fruits and veggies which his wife fries sitting on the side. The tiny donuts she makes just melt in your mouth. Yummy!!! And then the fresh fruit juices…..this place is highly recommended.

7^th Jan – Tattoo Day!!! Finally, the day had come, when my hubby and me planned to get inked for the third time. A souvenir of Bali on our body.  Kadek Tattoo was our choice and it turned out to be a wise decision as he is an amazing artist with a very good speed and precision. His work is highly recommended.

  Kadek at work

8^th Jan – Time to head back home.

As they say all good things must come to an end, so did our Bali holiday. From the beaches of Bali, it was now time to freeze back home. With winters at peak, a holiday in Bali proved to be a perfect getaway.

Points to remember :-

1.      Try being there to celebrate New Year’s Eve. The entire stretch from Kuta Beach to Double Six Beach a abuzz with excitement.

2.      Keep in mind that traffic gets really bad, so plan your day accordingly. Do not plan too many things for one day as a very short distance can take hours at times.

3.      Taxi unions there do not let Uber cabs run. Even if you manage to book a cab via uber, your cabbie will ask you to cancel it once he arrives and try negotiating a deal with you. Since you don’t have much of a choice, you end up paying them, although you should not forget to bargain.

4.      If you’re just a couple traveling without kids, or a bunch of friends, then you can hop around on scooties easily available on rent after producing your driver’s license.

5.      Seafood is priced heavenly, way cheaper than Goa, so seafood lovers can really indulge themselves.

6.      Bintang beer is the most widely available beer there. Don’t miss it if you’re a beer lover.

7.      The same water bottle is priced differently in various stores. Circle K (open 24 hours) gives you the cheapest.

8.      Bali has many 24 hours departmental stores so you will never go hungry no matter what time of the night it is.

9.      Kuta/Legian/Seminyak area is the most crowded area and hence the dirty beaches but don’t get disheartened. The other side of the island has some amazingly beautiful beaches.

10.  Hotel accommodation isn’t very expensive, so don’t worry about burning a hole in your pocket.